Psyching for likes: how to make people like you

Man is by nature a social animal” – Aristotle

We are social beings by nature; for many of us, being liked by others is an innate desire. We dress, act, and behave in certain ways that would grant us as much approval as possible from our peers (unless you’re a non-conformist and really don’t care what others think), and these acts of seeking acceptance can be both conscious and unconscious.

To become even more well-liked however — the sky’s definitely the limit in this case — here are some useful psychological tips for developing your relationships better, and faster:

1. When being a copycat isn’t annoying


“Mirroring”, also known as the “chameleon effect”, is the subtle mimicking of another person’s body language, gestures, and facial expressions. Copying another’s behaviour facilitates liking because it builds rapport, and the higher the level of mimicry, the more the other person will like you. It can also happen unintentionally, which is often seen in long-term couples who become increasingly alike.

2. Stalk Follow them everywhere

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According to the “mere-exposure effect”, people tend to like things that they are constantly exposed to, and are familiar with. Research has shown that people demonstrated a greater affinity for those whom they see more often, even if they haven’t had any interaction with them at all.

3. Nice guys (don’t always) finish last

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Thanks to the “spontaneous trait transference”, people will associate you with things that you say about others. Compliment someone as friendly and generous, and you will be associated with those qualities as well. Make someone else out to be a backstabber, and you’ll be thought of as one too. I guess it’s a bit like karma — what goes around, comes around.

4. Nobody’s perfect

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While making mistakes may result in embarrassment on your part, it isn’t actually all that disastrous because revealing that you aren’t entirely perfect makes you more relatable and approachable (or adorkable) to others. Just like how Simone Biles managed to continue capturing everyone’s hearts even after slipping on the balance beam, simple mistakes made after proving your worth can increase attraction towards you thanks to the “pratfall effect”.

5. Share your sob story

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Not surprisingly, sharing secrets and personal information with another person will increase their attraction towards you because it builds trust. This is known as “self-disclosure”, and is possibly one of the best relationship-building techniques there is, but only if you start with friendly small-talk type of questions before slowly building up to increasingly personal ones. Otherwise, it’s going to backfire, and you’ll probably just come across as downright creepy.

So there you have it — psychological tricks to make people like you. Now go forth and capture hearts like you do Pokémon!

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By: Chan Choy Yu